A STEP IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION

Yesterday, Allen got a call from Eunita (our immigration case worker). She was calling to notify us of the provisional approval of the Form I-800. Yeah! One more hoop that we have jumped through. The US Department of State must now grant final approval of the I-800. We don't really know how long this step might take, but we are moving in the right direction. Our understanding is that once the state department approves our I-800, they will send a cable to the embassy in Manila indicating approval. Then things SHOULD really start moving as the kids travel to Manila for medical exams and visa interviews... At that point, it would PROBABLY be a matter of weeks. Of course, all of this is surrounded by a big question mark. We need to keep praying that we don't get hung up somewhere else in the process. For now, for today, we have jumped another hurdle and we are grateful for any movement at all.

BOSTON TEA PARTY

The Children's Shelter of Cebu has their own school. It is just a quick walk down the road from the shelter. All of our kids are currently being educated there. When children learn that they will be adopted into a US family, they begin American Studies. They study literature and history and many things that would be pertinent to our country. (Rodrigo was learning about American money the other day!) Here is a picture of a few kids acting out the Boston Tea Party. Roselyn is in the back of the boat on the right. It's pretty cute, I think. Last Sunday night we asked Romeo what he was studying this week. He had a blank look on his face, shrugged his shoulders and looked up at his teacher. "What are we studying, Teacher Tammy???" It made us laugh...and know for sure that he is a pretty typical 11-year-old. The answer (by the way) was - Abraham Lincoln. This is really no different than asking me what I had for dinner yesterday. I can usually remember...but only after a few minutes of thinking really hard!
You gotta love the kid though. He had a big smile on his face throughout the entire conversation...and from all reports, seems to be really trying in school. He gets an A+ for attitude.

Here is a picture Roselyn playing Foosball with some kids. She is the one with the blue striped shirt. And, oh...by the way...the little boy next to her sticking his tongue out?? Yep, that's Rodrigo! That's my son!

NIGHT VISITORS

I woke up to a scurry of footsteps this morning. Something had happened during the night and by the reaction of Lindsay and Allen, I couldn't tell if it was good or bad. As I turned the corner to the entry way of our house, I saw them staring out the window with a look of disbelief. Well, I looked out the window and there was WHITE everywhere. No... it was (thankfully) not snow...yet. It was toilet paper. Lots of it. We had night visitors...and I don't think it was just one or two. Our front yard was hit pretty hard. They did a beautiful job on our front yard and porch (including our door handle). The disturbing part of this is that we had our windows open last night and our room faces the front of the house. Our guard dog Bernie, didn't hear a thing (and obviously neither did we!). We also have motion detectors which usually scare unsuspecting criminals away. It kind of creeps me out to think that some teenage boys (I'm pretty sure they were boys) were running around our yard last night wreaking havoc on our lawn and we didn't have a clue! It makes me believe that these people were professionals and knew EXACTLY what they were doing.

The trees were tee-peed. There were words written in the grass, forks in the lawn, rubber bands all over the driveway. Our cars were wrapped with cellophane and there was Vaseline on the door handles. Actually, to be quite honest, it was kind of pretty and reminded me of the first snowfall. The good news in all of this is that we came away with 9 partial rolls of TP and lots of rubber bands (which I will definitely use)! It took a little effort to clean up the mess, but we appreciated how thoughtful the culprits were for using high-quality TP. We found enough clues to help us to solve this mystery, but given the magnitude of this offense, retaliation will be highly discouraged.

NEW GLASSES

Allen has been thinking that it is time to update his glasses. I think that he looks fine, but everyone needs a change once in a while, right? He brought home some glasses this week to see if I could help him decide on a new pair. I am happy to help with these sorts of decisions, but I can never decide which one is best! I usually like them all! You want a change, maybe something a little more updated...but not too trendy as to stick out. So...Allen proceeded to try each pair on for me. The first time through, I got a brief overview of all three pairs. I made no comments. The second time around, he put each pair on, looked at me straight on, then turned his head slowly from side to side so I could get a good look. When he finished, I asked him to do it yet a third time. When he got to Pair #2, I said, "EEEWW! I know for sure that I do NOT like those! You can definitely eliminate them from the mix." He put them aside and tried Pair #3 again. I just couldn't decide between Pair #1 and Pair #3 so I told him that they both looked great! Problem solved. Or wait, maybe not.

Allen had a sick look on his face that I just couldn't figure out. I looked at him and asked..."What?!" With a slight smile he picked up Pair #2 and responded..."Mary, this pair, Pair #2 are my old glasses!! I have worn these glasses EVERY day for the last year!!" We both started to crack up. I felt sort of bad, but all I could do was laugh. Allen wasn't quite sure what to think!

I'd like to believe that I am a person who pays attention to detail, but really, I am pretty clueless when it comes to certain things. Evidently, I haven't been looking... REALLY looking at my husband for the last year. Either that, or maybe I HAVE been looking right past the glasses on his face to his heart. There. That is a good explanation, don't you think? Whatever the case, it seems as if it is indeed time for Allen to get a new pair of glasses. If you happen to see Allen in the next few weeks, ask him if he recently got new glasses. And please...tell him how good they look.

FISH BOWL

I stopped at the bank today. The lady asked me if Allen was doing better after his illness last winter. She is one of Allen's patients and I guess hasn't been to see him for a while. Of course, I said he was fine and I decided to tell her about the adoption. She was very interested and excited to hear our news. Allen had the dengue fever last January and people STILL ask me if he has recovered. (Last they heard, he was in the hospital on his death bed!! :) I think it is very sweet when people ask and it makes me glad that I live in a small town.

When we moved to Cambridge, someone referred to life in this community as a FISH BOWL. This town is small enough that...as you become involved and build relationships, there is a lot of overlap in who you see and what connections you make. The people you work with...are the same people you sit next to at your daughter's swim meet... are the same people you see in the grocery store... are the same people you go to church with... are the same people that you live next to. Unfortunately, there are times when there are disagreements and uncomfortable encounters. People talk and talk and talk... That is NOT so good. Usually, sooner or later, what comes around, goes around and it is hurtful. In spite of this, I think that living in a FISH BOWL is good because you can't hide. You can bet that that person who drives you most crazy will sit at the table next to you at Perkins or be on the same school committee...or (heaven forbid!!) that their son is dating your daughter!! Then what?? You can either choose to ignore them or do your best to get along. Avoiding them is SOOO much easier (and believe me, I've been down that road!). Life is so much better when we are forced to settle our differences and be accountable in our relationships. It is hard, but so healthy for us. Living in a FISH BOWL is good for me. It is a never-ending journey and I think that I am only now starting to get it.

On the other side of the FISH BOWL...there is nothing better than living in a small community when things go wrong. As we (and many others) have faced a crisis, people always rally around to do whatever they can to help. Maybe it's a meal, or a phone call, or simply a kind word. Maybe it's the lady at the bank who simply asked about my husband today. It was a small thing, but it meant a lot to me. It is called the FISH BOWL effect and I think I like it. I think I'll stay right where I am and keep growing in my little FISH BOWL.

MOTHERS AND DAUGHTERS

I have a picture frame on my night stand that says MOTHERS AND DAUGHERS. I've had it for several years. It is rather outdated, but I don't really care because it means something to me. I just like looking at the picture. I try to update this picture every once in a while. When all three of the girls were living at home, the picture changed a few times a year. Now it changes only once or twice a year. It's not really because we never see each other...I just forget to take one when we ARE together. I MADE the girls take a picture with me before Kristin left on Sunday. Of course, they were very compliant... :). I know that in a few months, I will need to take an updated picture with Roselyn! I look forward to when I can go to bed at night and stare at my NEW picture with all FOUR of my daughters. HEY! Maybe I need to get another one that says MOTHERS AND SONS...or MOTHERS AND SONS AND DAUGHTERS... or MOTHERS AND CHILDREN...or FATHERS AND SONS (for Allen, of course) ...or OUR CHILDREN...or FAMILY...?? Hmmm. I'll have to think about that. Oh well, tonight as I settle in for sleep, I will pick up my MOTHERS and DAUGHTERS picture frame, look at this picture and know that I am truly blessed.

THE NEXT STEP

This morning I made a call to our adoption counselor (Jill) to see what the next step in our adoption process will be. The next step would be to send our paperwork to the Philippines and wait for their government to grant us custody of the children. Well, that step has already been done...several months ago as a matter of fact. We do have legal custody of the children. The problem is, the dates on the documents granting us custody precede the date when immigration services implemented the new procedure here in the U.S. We don't know if immigration will accept the "custody documents" that we have or will ask us to repeat this step in order to get new documents with new dates. This would mean sending the paperwork to the Philippines (again) and waiting for them to review our case (again)... Either way, it takes time. Jill said to check back in a week to see how things are progressing. (A WEEK!??) She went ahead and sent the current documents to immigration in hopes that they will accept them as is. Of course, we covet your prayers in this matter.

On a brighter note, we talked to our kids last night! They sounded really good... but anxious to come! Roselyn asked a lot of questions about school and her schedule. I think the thought of entering a large American public school is very frightening to her. I don't blame her one bit. She also asked a lot of questions about our church and the youth group. All I can say about the boys is that they just sounded so cute!

That's the update for today. I'll keep you posted.

MOVING DAY

Today we moved Kristin back to Bethel. Cross country starts tomorrow for her. She is in one of Bethel's townhouses and will be living with 5 other girls this year. It was nice to move in on a day when there was no one there. Kristin's friend Meagan also moved in this afternoon. Other than the heat, everything went very smoothly.

It is hard to believe that I moved into Bethel's townhouse East about 25 years ago. I was only one building over from where Kristin is. Same floor, same room. It was fun to remember how life was back then. Allen was a freshman at Hamline (just down the road a few miles). Neither of us had a car so we had to use public transportation to and from our respective colleges to see each other. He (of course) did most of the commuting. It meant taking the city bus to Har Mar shopping center and the Bethel shuttle to my campus. Very time consuming, but I'm sure Allen would say it was well worth it! :) One evening, Allen caught the Bethel shuttle back to Har Mar, but missed the last city bus to Hamline. He walked the last two miles in a snowstorm to Hamline. No kidding! Poor guy. Is it any wonder that I married this man??! Those were fun days. (Maybe not so fun for him, I guess!!?)

I know that Kristin has a great year ahead of her!! College life can be pretty stressful, but really, really fun too. Have a super year, Kristin. Don't forget to call your mother!!

I800A - APPROVED!

Today our I800A got the stamp of approval. Yeah!! I got the call around noon today. It is a small victory in this long and drawn-out adoption process. What does this mean?? We get to move on to the next hurdle! We need confirmation from the Philippines that we have guardianship of our kids next. (There seems to be some confusion because we think that this step is has already been completed...?) Either way, you can be sure we will be on the phone Monday morning talking with our social worker.

Today was a good day!

SCHOOL SHOPPING

Today I went to Target with Kristin and Stephanie. School shopping is not what it used to be. I remember going to the SCHOOL section of the store and spending a lot of time picking out folders, trapper keepers, notebooks, crayons, kleenex, etc... You know the drill because many of you have been there doing exactly the same thing! Now when we go, we make a brief stop in the SCHOOL section to pick up a few notebooks and immediately make a beeline for the HEALTH AND BEAUTY aisle and the DORM section. When did that change?? When did they stop looking for their favorite puppy, kitty or Lisa Frank folders?? It is kind of like trying to remember the last time your "baby" sat on your lap (and didn't crush you!). It just happens...sometime.

Well, as we made our quick sweep through the SCHOOL section at Target, I gasped at the realization that school was going to start whether my kids are here or not and if I want a chance to get the GOOD stuff- especially for Romeo and Rodrigo, I needed to get to work!! I frantically searched through the pages of school supplies trying to find the lists for my two boys. You would think that the list for Cambridge would be easiest to find since...this is Cambridge! Well, all I could find were lists for every other town around here. Finally, I found the 5th grade list for Cambridge! No luck on the kindergarten list, so I grabbed another Kindergarten list thinking that it would be about the same. At any rate, I started my school supply search for Romeo and Rodrigo. The dry erase marker, glue sticks, pencils and highlighters were easy choices. Basically, no frills school supplies. But when I came to the folders and notebooks, I was paralyzed with indecision. Should I go with the plain ones...or the fun ones with the pictures on them? Is it "babyish" to have a design or basketball player on your notebook (when you are 11-years-old)?? Besides all of that, I had no idea WHO the basketball player was??...or any of the other athletes for that matter. Is this guy a good role model? What kind of message would I be sending to Romeo to buy something with an egotistical sports figure on it??? Oh my goodness! I think I need some help. I decided to wait on the notebooks, folders and pencil box. It all worked out ok because the other two girls were about ready to move on to the HEALTH and BEAUTY section of the store. I will deal with it later.

New realization for today - My days back in the SCHOOL section at Target have returned!

THE AGE OF MIRACLES

This summer, I read a book called the AGE OF MIRACLES. Its subtitle is Embracing The New Midlife. I don't think of myself as someone in their midlife, but well...I guess that I am. I just don't always act like it. Anyway, I thought this book looked interesting and it was. Although I didn't appreciate everything this author had to say, I did glean some very positive thoughts about growing older and embracing midlife. Here are a few quotes...

"Age involves a lot of letting go--some of our physical prowess, perhaps, or certain worldly opportunities, or our children to live their own lives. Yet such letting go isn't meant to constitute a depressing sacrifice of happiness. Anytime we're called to let go of something, there's a hidden treasure to be found in the experience. No birthing of anything new can occur without a dying of the old.

You're carefree before becoming a parent, in a way you will never be again. But you're satisfied, having become one, in a way you never could have been before. And that's where our generation is now. We're no longer carefree. But we're something else instead. We are grown-ups in the deepest sense, and that is new psychological territory..."

"The only way I can know what I should be doing is if I focus on who I should be. That doesn't mean there aren't magnificent things we're supposed to do, but God can only work for us to the extent that He can work through us. Putting our focus on being who He would have us be is the only sure way we'll ever come close to doing what He would have us do."

"Aging humbles us, it's true--but it also awakens us to how precious life is, and how very fragile."

I think that this last quote is very true for me. I am much more appreciative of things and people at this point in my life than when I was young(er?). It is a good thing and something I plan on enjoying as I get even older!

I-800A SAGA

Allen called Yanita this morning only to learn that she couldn't find the information that Jill sent via Fed Ex last week. Jill sent it last Wednesday and is quite sure that it must be there. When I talked with Jill today, she was optimistic that Yanita will approve our I-800A today or tomorrow (if she can find the paperwork!). Her concern however, is with the I-800 which is our next hurdle. If the I-800 takes as long as the I-800A, our timeline will be extended even longer. Our I-800 paperwork is ready to go, but it will probably require some tweaking as our I-800A did. Someone had suggested that we contact Norm Coleman's office to help to push this through. It seems as though his office has been most effective in helping adoptive families with these kinds of problems. We have already made calls to other elected officials, but maybe we'll give this a shot. Anyone out there have a personal connection with a high ranking government official???? Any other suggestions???

We are getting a bit desperate. Allen was talking about booking a flight to St. Louis at the National Benefits Center (where Yanita is) to hand deliver the documents, if it would help. I would call the President, if I thought he would answer his phone. :) We have considered asking to be reassigned to a new person at the National Benefit Center, but we also don't want to rock the boat and make things worse. Jill said today that we have to tread carefully because the NBC has all the power in granting approval for visas to adoptive families. By the way, they have approved only two I-800As and no I-800s to date. That is in the entire country!! So...we wait, we try to be patient and we try to be nice.

Please keep praying about this.

THE YOUNGEST MORK CHILDREN!

I had a dream last night that our kids were here! I have been having more dreams as of late which is maybe a sign that they will be here soon??? Unfortunately, most of my dreams are disastrous! Most of the disaster is related to boys. I don't put a lot of stock into my dreams because, to tell you the truth, most of my dreams are disastrous, crazy, or at the very least...extremely odd. However, they usually do reflect a shadow of what I have been thinking about. To dream about boys might indicate that I am scared to death to tackle this new breed.

Here is my life experience with boys. I have 3 sisters and 1 brother. I have 3 daughters. I have always had lots of girlfriends but only a couple of boyfriends. I have always appreciated boys, but never really understood them. It seems that the first thing that people say when they find out about our boys is... "Boys?!! In the Mork house?? You have got to be kidding?" This is usually followed up by a knowing smirk and a... "heh, heh, heh..." I don't really mind. It actually makes me kind of excited about life with boys. Plus, I happen to think that boys will be lots of fun and we might just be really good at raising them??? Who knows? It is just another reason for us to hang on tight to Jesus to walk us through all of this.

Something happened to me when we were away to "the cabin". It was a turning point for me. There was a psychological and maybe spiritual change that took place. for me. I have been excited for our kids to come, but now I am ready for them to come. Something clicked and I am really ready to go. This is still really exciting and scary and daunting all at the same time...but I am ready for this new chapter to begin. Boys and another teenage daughter?? Let's go...bring it on! :)

Here are more pictures of our kids. Don't they look great! I'm very proud of what I see!

I-800A UPDATE

I wish I could tell you that things are moving along quickly with our adoption process, but I can't. Every day, people ask WHEN the kids are coming and it is so frustrating to not have an answer. Since the new immigration process for Hague countries has been put in place, things have simply slowed down to a snail's pace. Jill (our adoption counselor) told me last week that only two families (nationwide) have been approved in regards to their I-800A since the change took place. I knew that the process was going to take a while and that there would be plenty of red tape, but this all seems so ridiculous! Jill told me that since the new standards have been put into place, the process, the detail work is MUCH worse than they had anticipated. Of course, it makes a lot more work for the adoption counselors and they are frustrated as well.

Last Tuesday Yanita (our immigration contact person) told us that everything was in order to approve our I-800A. However, there was one UNSIGNED document she needed from Jill. Jill had already sent the SIGNED document (at Yanita's request) but Yanita evidently had made a mistake in asking for a SIGNED document. She admitted that this was her mistake. SO...Yanita wanted to receive the UNSIGNED document by Wednesday because she was going to be out of the office for three days for a minor medical procedure. (She could have possibly approved the I-800A last Wednesday and we could have possibly proceeded to the I-800!!) Jill tried to contact Yanita on Tuesday p.m. without success...then sent the UNSIGNED document in hopes that it was the correct piece of paper. She didn't get a confirmation that Yanita had received the papers so we were waiting for Yanita to come back. Yanita was due to come back today- Tuesday. I called this morning and learned that she requested another day out of the office. I will try to call again tomorrow to see if she got the document that Jill sent and if our I-800A has been approved. We would appreciate your prayers in this matter.

This is probably more information that you really need, but it is difficult to explain where we are at without getting into a long explanation. The last two months have been a series of missed phone messages, time out of the office for vacations, funerals, and medical leave, etc... I am sorry if it seems like I am being critical of the people that have been helping us. I'm not. I know that they have 100 other people that are trying to do the same thing as us. Those families are all feeling the sense of urgency as well. I understand that these things are legitimate, but it has been difficult to understand. I feel like much of this paperwork is... not that complicated and we just would like someone to help us get it done.

Meanwhile, our kids in the Philippines are anxious to come. They have recently said goodbye to some of their friends who have been adopted to families in the United States. I feel the most compassion for Roselyn at this time. She was in a room with two other good teenage girlfriends. Both have left and she now shares a room with three 10-year-old girls. I know she misses her friends dearly, but is trying to be a good example for the younger ones. Roselyn seems so ready to come start her new life with us.

We did a skype call with the kids on Sunday. It was a good call but they were obviously hanging on every word when I started talking about the long wait and when we can come to get them. The delays are hard for us to understand. It is even harder for them to understand. I am proud of how they are hanging in there! We have been told that in spite of their impatience, they are trying to make the best of it.

I hope that I might know more about the I-800A tomorrow. I will certainly let you know when I learn anything that is news worthy.

CUTE LITTLE PEOPLE!!

Each year when we visit Three Lakes, we spend part of a day with our friends, the Berrys. This year it was our turn to go to their lake home (about 30 miles away from Three Lakes). Our great niece, Annika, was there as well as the other "Berry" grandchildren. I couldn't resist taking a few shots of these cute kids. We are not used to having little ones around our house any more so it is always a treat to get some time with them. We have been friends with this family for a long time. Long enough to have memories of Stephanie as a baby sitting on their beach buck naked eating handfuls of sand. How fun to watch another generation enjoy the sand on their beach! Steph is now taller than me and swims like a fish in the water. Time flies when you're having fun!!

THINGS I LOVE ABOUT THREE LAKES

Just to clarify something... Three Lakes is the name of the town, Island Lake is the name of the lake, and King's Point Lodge is the name of the place that we stay every year. For some reason, when our family refers to our summer vacation experience, we always call it "Three Lakes" or "the cabin". Really, neither is accurate but we do it anyway. It is a very special place for all of us and we all have our favorite things. Here are some of mine!

I love the beauty!
















I love summer cooking and our Iron Chef competition!
















I love all the smiles!



























I love the time without all the distractions!







I guess most of all I love being with my family! What could be better?

IN THE WATER

The weather was beautiful while we were away! When we are not sitting around reading, sleeping and scrap booking, we are out in the water or on the boat doing something. Thankfully, we all love the water and enjoy playing in it! When our new kids come, swimming lessons are high on the priority list!

I'M BACK!!

Greetings to all my friends in blogland! I am sorry to have been away for such a long time. Like many of you, I have been away on vacation with my family. I didn't feel very good about making an announcement that we would be gone for two weeks...so I didn't. But now I am back!

We were in Wisconsin near a small town called Three Lakes. This is the fourth year we have rented this place and we love it! It was built in the 1940's and has stayed in the same family for all these years. It is located on a chain of about 27 lakes so there is a lot of exploring to be done. There is a main house as well as a boat house which sleeps 5-6. We like it because it feels rustic, but is very comfortable. They have modernized all the bathrooms and the kitchen without making them feel new. (Does that make sense?) Because it is located on a point, it is very private. It is a great time for all of us to "check out" of life for a while. We (try) to turn off the cell phones, rarely turn on the radio or TV, and do LOTS of reading, playing games and just... being together. We often invite a extra girlfriends for a few days (or an occasional boyfriend!). Our parents usually come as well. NEXT YEAR, we will have our own 3 NEW kids and we are very excited to show them our summer retreat.

The good news and the bad news is that there is no internet service. The day that we got there I told Allen that I was sad to not be able to blog while we were gone. It would be a good time for me to write quite a bit because of all the extra time I have during the day. On the other hand, it would be just like me to sit at the computer inside on a beautiful day while my family is playing outside. So, all in all, it's probably good that I don't have access to my computer. Now I have a bit of catching up to do.

It was so good to be in church yesterday. I have been out of town the last five Sundays!! It certainly felt like coming home and made me realize what a gift we have in our church family. A few of you were wondering if we were gone as you noticed that I hadn't posted for a while. Thanks for making me feel like you missed hearing from me.

There are so many things that I want to talk about...our vacation, our adoption update, the start of school and the olympics!! I hope you don't mind, but I will post some pictures from our trip. I bought a new camera about a month ago and am trying to learn about it. Anyway, I whittled my pictures down to only 500 and will share a few of those with you. I know how unfun (not a word!) it can be to hear about someone's family vacation, but you can just bleep over the things that don't interest you. I'll work on that in the next few days.

About the adoption...Basically, things are moving slowly. We don't have a date of when the kids will come, but it seems doubtful that it can happen before school starts in a few weeks. I'll write more about this later as well.

Every year, we try to get a family picture while we are at the cabin. This year was no exception. Many of you know, as your family grows and gets older, it is more challenging to get all together at the same time in the same place. For me, the cabin is usually the best place to make an attempt to get that ever-important Christmas picture. I don't imagine that we will use these pictures for our Christmas cards this year because there are 3 kids missing! In that case, this might be my only chance to share these pics with you! My kids are pretty good sports about all the picture-taking that goes on in our house, but there is usually a bit of groaning that takes place when we try to take the dreaded Christmas card picture. Bjork (Lindsay's boyfriend) took these pictures and did a great job. You will notice, however, that there is a slight lack of cooperation leading up to the perfect shot. I find it very amusing and would love to use one of the rejects some year. Not to worry, when our NEW kids come, you can be sure that I will go for the perfect Christmas picture as usual.

ALMOST a GOOD picture!

DEFINITELY a BAD picture!!